This guest post is by Toby Gaynor, a young man on the autism spectrum who has been accepted and is attending into SUNY Oneonta studying Meteorology. Toby is applying for the Spring 2020 Making a Difference Autism Scholarship via the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference started by me, Kerry Magro. I was nonverbal till 2.5 and diagnosed with autism at 4 and you can read more about my organization here. Can I ask for a favor? I’m trying to make this nonprofit self-sufficient so I can make this my full-time job supporting the special needs community and would appreciate you taking a minute before reading on to watch this video below and subscribing to our Youtube page here to get to learn more about the work we do in the community.
I hope you can support my nonprofit like I’m trying to support these students with scholarship aid for college. Learn more on how you can help our cause with a small donation (just asking for $3 today, equal to your daily cup of coffee) here.
I’m not sure when I first realized I had autism, but I always knew I would be a runner.
Running has been a strong part of my identity from my early childhood. My parents are runners and I grew up always knowing their passion and the great joy it bought them. This sparked interest and inspiration to give running a try.
Running has helped me to develop a better understanding of my autism and my autism has helped me to become a better runner. I find the sport of running useful as both a way of meditation and a personal challenge that drives me to accomplish my fullest potential. It has also exposed some of my greatest challenges – coping with failure and managing social anxiety and pressure.
I began running competitively from sixth through eighth grade on my middle school’s cross country team. My running career was very smooth; new personal records were thrown down almost every meet. However, the feeling of burnout and discouragement set in after cross country in eighth grade, following a season of very hard workouts and races. At the same time I was growing more aware of the impact of autism on me, especially my ability to connect with my classmates. Looking back on that time now, I think I just needed to step back from the intensity of racing and rediscover why running was important to me. It helped me to manage day to day stress and it was a way to connect with other kids my age.
With the return of interest and confidence in running, I felt more than ready for high school training and racing. On the first day of high school cross country practice, my coach acknowledged my strong middle school record and a fast 5k race over the summer. He knew that I had the potential to be an excellent varsity runner. A couple of other strong freshman and I were placed in the A-squad race in the first few meets; the race allowed fifteen entries. After placing well within the top five, I earned my position on the varsity team.
After being named “Rookie of the Year” in Freshman Year, Sophomore year was the first year I had very high expectations of myself as a runner. I experienced doubts during races which caused me to sometimes give up mentally and not push myself. While I was a leading member of my team, I sometimes felt like I finished last in terms of fitting in and experiencing friendship.
To overcome this, my parents and coach taught me the most important aspect of running, mental stamina. Despite how training and physical ability play a huge role in running success, the ability to maintain focus and effort ultimately determines the results of race day. Victories come when a runner keeps their mind positive. Even though nervousness may naturally creep in on the starting line, you will succeed if you let any nervousness go once the gun goes off. Over the summer between Sophomore and Junior year, I spent a lot of time on strategies to build my mental stamina. I confronted my weaknesses, trained smarter and got stronger. I believe my autism has given me an edge – routine, discipline, and focus on things I love have defined my autism and now define me as a runner.
I went on to achieve many goals during my Senior cross country season and was named “MVP”. I can say now that I find more confidence in being different, and I believe running has given me the confidence to take on challenging classes and remain focused even when school gets very stressful. I look forward to running for a DIII program in college and to never stop learning from all my experiences.
Follow my journey on Facebook, my Facebook Fan Page, & Instagram!
My name is Kerry Magro, a professional speaker and best-selling author who is also on the autism spectrum that started the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference in 2011 to help students with autism receive scholarship aid to pursue a post-secondary education. Help support me so I can continue to help students with autism go to college by making a tax-deductible donation to our nonprofit here.
Toby, your story is beautifully written and your voice comes through strongly and clearly – it is a joy to read and reread. How wonderful that you have learned to use your passion for running to support you through challenges the world presents. Your awareness of your strengths and interests is remarkable for someone your age – you are wise beyond your years. You have learned to channel your energy to keep yourself motivated and focused on your goals. I have always known you to be thoughtful and inquisitive, a scientist at heart, but your story has shown me that you are also a leader with strength and courage who leads by example and will inspire many, including me. Thank you for sharing your experience and insight. I look forward to hearing about all that you accomplish in the future.
Well written article! Good luck to Toby! SUNY is lucky to have him represent their school!
The Mooney’s were at many of Toby’s races and we watched him grow and mature both as a young man and an unbelievable runner. This is one of the most well written documents that I have read from a 17 year old in a long long time and you can tell this came straight from the soul with a lot of refection back on his journey to this point. Toby’s writing here sends us a clear message that he is ready to turn the page and looking forward to starting the next chapter!
Such a beautiful story Toby, thank you for sharing it!
Toby is a true inspiration!! I wish I had a fraction of his determination and perseverance. We definitely need dedicated young man like this studying the atmosphere so we can finally trust the forecasted weather reports!!
Toby’s story is truly inspirational – facing autism head on is a mark of maturity and strength! Routine, discipline and focus are key elements in successes in racing and in life. Keep on doing what you are doing and you will reach that “runner’s-high” both ON and OFF the track!
Toby is one of the kindest, gentle people on this Earth. He has drive and stamina that set him apart in fantastic ways. He is well deserving of the recognition this page is providing and definitely reflects the Kerry Magro mission. Whatever the decision is regarding the scholarship, I am delighted for Toby to be connected to the community that Kerry has created!
I recently read the guest post “Running Has Given Me Confidence Growing Up With Autism” What a great story by a remarkable young man ! I applaud and support your non profit organization KFM Making A Difference. Thanks to you Kerry , you are making an incredible difference in the lives of students with Autism.
Toby- you are one amazing young man that inspires everyone! Keep going buddy!
I enjoyed reading and learning all about Tobys trials and tribulations while sticking with his passion of running. Those are tough years. I loved reading that he had the strength to follow that passion. The fact that he was recognized by his coach and peers is also a credit to him. I wish him all the luck in SUNY and the Dill Running Program
Go Toby !!!
So proud of you, Toby! Way to go!!
I have watched Toby grow from a quiet and shy boy to an amazingly wonderful and happy young man. His dedication and determination are extraordinary. I am so proud of the fine young man he has become and know he will make a difference in the life of anyone he meets. Follow your dreams, Toby, and never give up!!
Very well written! Toby has grown into a great runner and an even better person. I’m excited to watch him excel on the college level.
Toby is a amazing person. He has been a volunteer for the IgA Nephropathy foundation of America’s annual 5 k for several years. He is kind compassionate with an altruistic soul. Toby is an inspiration to all. We should follow his footsteps!
This is so beautiful and inspirational, keep on running!
Excellent and inspiring essay Toby! Now I am encouraged to address my own lack of routine, discipline, focus and mental stamina when it comes to defeating physical challenges. Wishing you every success!
What an amazing story – pushing through and looking to become an advocate for others that share the same story. By sharing this story he will help so many others that may face the same challenges that they can push through it. This is very inspiring and beautiful. Good luck on your journey and keep running!!
What a wonderful article. Kudos to Toby. I found his insight to self particularly impressive
So proud of Toby Gaynor! His motivation, dedication and not to mention a smile that lights up the whole room is a inspiration to all of us. He has more than earned of all his current success and more. I truly believe he is deserving of this scholarship.
Toby’s well documented personal journey is as inspiring as it is enlightening. It’s remarkable how two huge aspects of his life, his autistic challenge and his love of running, have entwined in a way that helps him stay strong and confident when he feels pressure. I hope that Toby’s story reaches many people who will take away the same inspiration that I have found in reading it.
I have known Toby since those first years of non verbal. His family always surrounded him with love and encouragement. I watched him grow as he describes above and mature. He always strived to be the best he could be and find his way with such immense encouragement from his entire family. He will go on to continue to achieve because of the foundations, love and encouragement and his self motivation.
Toby’s essay was very inspirational! He’s an amazing young man with a bright future ahead! All the best to you, Toby!
Toby’s essay was so inspirational! He’s an amazing young man with a bright future ahead. All the best!