This guest post is by Rachel Nielsen, a young woman on the autism spectrum who was diagnosed with ASD at age 5 and plans to attend the University of Nebraska Omaha. Rachel is applying for the Spring 2023 Making a Difference Autism Scholarship via the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference started by me, Kerry Magro. I was nonverbal till 2.5 and diagnosed with autism at 4 and you can read more about my organization here. Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams, our nonprofit’s new book, was released on March 29, 2022 on Amazon here for our community to enjoy featuring the stories of 100 autistic adults.
When I was younger I had a fairly good vocabulary, but I also exhibited social and motor delays. I was still behind cognitively and needed to be placed in a special ed classroom during my elementary years. I would meltdowns when I did not get my way. At first I didn’t know that I had autism. I didn’t understand what it was and how it affected my learning. I always thought I was just like other kids and they probably thought so too. I was a little socially awkward, yet I had a fair amount of friends that I’d always go out and play with when I went to elementary school or in my old neighborhood. I was diagnosed with autism at 18 months, but it was not a final diagnosis until I was 5 years old. Like most parents, mine didn’t know what the future would hold for me when they found out I was autistic. I had an IEP ever since I started school so that the educational system knows what I need to work on and what I have done well. Originally I wanted to become a vet, but when I was 4th grade that’s when I discovered my love for drawing and writing. I enjoyed drawing so much (and I still do) that I would often draw little animal characters during class and keep pages of my drawings within my personal binder. I would even daydream little scenarios for each of my characters and sometimes write them within a story. I got influenced by Western animation, anime, video games, and books. Making up those silly little characters and telling stories was when I decided that someday I wanted to influence a new generation of animators by becoming a part of the animation industry.
I’d say the biggest challenge growing up was when I stayed in my personal bubble. I was a lot more shy and didn’t socialize that much as I do now. I was also having difficulty expressing myself as I was going through puberty. It was scary because at the time I didn’t know how to ask for help and I didn’t know how to express my feelings in a way that I could understand or my parents could understand. I eventually went through a period of depression and harbored self hatred, making me feel that I wasn’t “normal” like the other kids. I had mostly expressed suicide at my mother’s house because there I would sometimes have outbursts of anger towards my mom and her boyfriend because they didn’t know how to explain to me the ways I could act better. Since they were divorced, switching from my mom and dad’s house 50/50 added to the stress of attending high school. I had to go to therapy to talk about my feelings and learn how I can improve myself as a person. Along the way my stepmom was willing to talk to me whenever I felt angry, sad, or frustrated, whether it was school or personal issues. She’d talk to me in a way that would make me understand because sometimes it would be a little complex for me to grasp a certain concept.
Finally my parents eventually got my doctor to prescribe me sertraline, which helped me a lot to reduce my violent behavior and anger. And because I was willing to perform tremendously well in high school that I graduated with 3.70 GPA and received the magna cum laude award. It was the most prestigious award I’ve ever gotten in my lifetime and I was immensely proud of myself, along with my parents. Since then I’ve learned that I can change for the better despite the circumstances being tough. I also learned from my stepmother that I should be proud of my accomplishments that I achieved with autism and learning ways to not let the autism be the biggest part of my life. I wouldn’t be my unique self. And I took her words to heart. Because of her advice I now value tolerance and love for everyone who has a disability. She has given me strength to never be ashamed of my disability and always strive to do my best.
During high school, I was told by my stepmom that high school was time for me to discover myself and go out of my comfort zone. That’s when I discovered my love for acting and being onstage. For my first play I did Peter Pan in my sophomore year. At first I was too nervous to audition, but I eventually pushed those fears aside and eventually got a part in the play. It felt so gratifying to make people so happy every time I came onstage. I have also done the Best of West during my junior year, which is a talent show for my school, and I sang one song. I didn’t win but I think what’s important is showing my confidence and having fun, not competition. I have also done another play in my Drama II class called Almost, Maine. The first show during my senior year was Amelie: The Musical, and I was part of the ensemble. The last show I did was called the Brothers Grimm Spectaculathon. These drama programs have gotten me out of my comfort zone more, which feels gratifying to me because I get to express myself. When I’m onstage, I am not the Rachel who has autism, but someone who radiates confidence and energy. I recently graduated from a 2 year college. I just got a job and I want to continue my education so I can be employed and prepare for living on my own. With autism, my best life.
From my entire high school career I learned that just because you were born different, doesn’t mean that you can’t reach for the stars. If you have a goal in mind, give it your all and don’t stop dreaming. Don’t stop doing what you love and live life to the fullest.
Follow my journey on Facebook, my Facebook Fan Page, Tiktok, Youtube & Instagram.
My name is Kerry Magro, a professional speaker and best-selling author who is also on the autism spectrum that started the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference in 2011 to help students with autism receive scholarship aid to pursue post-secondary education. Help support me so I can continue to help students with autism go to college by making a tax-deductible donation to our nonprofit here.
Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams, was released on March 29, 2022 on Amazon here for our community to enjoy featuring the stories of 100 autistic adults. 100% of the proceeds from this book go back to our nonprofit to support initiatives like our autism scholarship program. In addition, this autistic adult’s essay you just read will be featured in a future volume of this book as we plan on making this into a series of books on autistic adults.
