This guest post is by Luna Coen, a young individual who was diagnosed with autism at 23 and currently attends Southern Oregon University. Luna is applying for the Spring 2023 Making a Difference Autism Scholarship via the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference started by me, Kerry Magro. I was nonverbal till 2.5 and diagnosed with autism at 4, and you can read more about my organization here. Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams, our nonprofit’s new book, was released on March 29, 2022, on Amazon here for our community to enjoy featuring the stories of 100 autistic adults.
Growing up I thought that I was abnormal because I would bounce my leg so much that it would make the whole mattress shake; I would hum so loud that I was told to stop during tests in school; I would collect things that I still haven’t used such as books, make-up, journals; etc. As I got older, I started to do more of these things. I would memorize parts of license plates, twitch my eyes because it felt good, buy stuffed animals even though I already had at least ten on my bed, hate the feeling of skinny jeans on my ankles, eat the same food in the same way repeatedly for months, watch the same shows over and over, etc. I also noticed that things that seemed like no big deal to others were the end of the world for me.
Learning to drive took years because after going for a short drive I would get out of the car and refuse to go driving again for weeks. It wasn’t until I was nineteen that I received my license, despite having my permit for three years. I was still terrified to go anywhere even if I knew how to get there because something could go wrong. Doing laundry is the worst because it could take longer than expected. However, my dad never took me to get a diagnosis, probably because he didn’t think that I had autism and because he told me growing up to not tell my doctor if something else was bothering me other than what I was there for. Because of this, I grew up without a diagnosis.
It wasn’t until I was with my then partner, who has autism, that I realized that I might have autism. We would talk about my stimming that I didn’t realize was stimming until he pointed it out to me. Because of this, I decided to pursue a diagnosis and was denied one, likely because I was masking during the diagnosis process and because I look feminine. Once I moved to Ashland, Oregon to continue my education, all of my roommates had autism and during October, one of my roommates and I went on a roadtrip to visit Halloweentown. During this trip we talked about more reasons to seek another diagnosis for autism such as me doing jazz hands when I get excited, my happy dance that I also do when I’m excited, not understanding sarcasm and jokes, etc. However, I was still settling into my new place and decided to wait a little longer.
Months later, I went on a beach trip with a group of TRIO students at my college to clean-up the beach where I was talking with a friend about if I was on the spectrum or not, who then gave me the name of a local doctor who could diagnose me with autism. I then decided to schedule an appointment with her to get a diagnosis so that I would finally have confirmation and because I was looking for more accommodations at my college, specifically, a single room for the price of a double in the dorms. The process seemed lengthy because we had to split it into two sessions that were interview style and for the second appointment, a friend of mine had to come in to discuss what they’ve noticed since meeting me back in October. The process made me anxious as I was concerned about being denied another diagnosis. Prior to my last session, I began to get anxious that my doctor would deny me a diagnosis because I wasn’t autistic enough. However, at the same time when my friend came in for the last part of the diagnosis process I was comforted and reassured that I do in fact have autism. They were able to point out things that I was unable to do. By the end of the second session I was given a diagnosis of autism and I am now able to proceed with the accommodation for a single room.
Having an official diagnosis has only confirmed what I knew all along: that there was something different about me. However, now I have a label for this uniqueness and am able to receive accommodations in academic settings to help me thrive in education as well as give an explanation to others, if I feel so inclined to do so.
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My name is Kerry Magro, a professional speaker and best-selling author who is also on the autism spectrum. I started the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference in 2011 to help students with autism receive scholarship aid to pursue post-secondary education. Help support me so I can continue to help students with autism go to college by making a tax-deductible donation to our nonprofit here.
Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams was released on March 29, 2022 on Amazon here for our community to enjoy featuring the stories of 100 autistic adults. 100% of the proceeds from this book will go back to our nonprofit to support initiatives like our autism scholarship program. In addition, this autistic adult’s essay you just read will be featured in a future volume of this book as we plan on making this into a series of books on autistic adults.
