This guest post is by Preston Leigh, a young man on the autism spectrum who was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome and ADHD at 9 years old and has been accepted into the University of Wisconsin. Preston is applying for the Spring 2022 Making a Difference Autism Scholarship via the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference started by me, Kerry Magro. I was nonverbal till 2.5 and diagnosed with autism at 4 and you can read more about my organization here. Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams, our nonprofit’s new book, was released on March 29, 2022 on Amazon here for our community to enjoy featuring the stories of 100 autistic adults.
If you were to ask someone if they thought I “had” anything, they would be more than likely not to mention anything related to the Autism Spectrum, besides the fact I am usually awkward with strangers. I have even had close friends that I have known for years shocked when I told them about my diagnosis and that I graduated from special education, which was a major compliment every time. If you were to ask someone that same question 10 years ago, their answer would be different. Back then, that was how many people remembered me: the weird kid.
No one likes bullies. They make you feel awful and want to hide in a corner forever. I was constantly targeted by bullies in elementary and middle school, all because I was different than them. What made me different from the rest was made clear when I was 7 years old, and officially diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome and ADHD. My behavior caused problems not just for me, but for my parents as well. They had a little kid on their hands that got into everything, somehow unlocked every door he pleased, played with toy cars on the road, and waltzed into random houses as he lived there. On the plus side, that made us a lot of acquaintances and friends.
I am very fortunate to have been born into a financially stable family with amazing neighbors, friends, local school faculty, and a mother who happened to be working in special education. My mother devoted a lot of time to helping me read, speak, socialize, and push myself to grow. I didn’t say my first actual word until I was 2 years old and didn’t start to walk until I was 1. Speech, behavioral, and physical therapy helped a lot, but it was still very slow growth. Despite this, my mother, teachers, neighbors, and family kept trying to push me in the right direction.
However, there was always a communication barrier with me, as I struggled to understand others and others struggled to understand me. Weirdly enough, I always got along very well with those much younger than me and was able to be myself around them. On the contrary, other kids in special education with me were more likely to not get along with me.
I got mentally stuck a lot. I was and am very lucky to have friends that stayed with me despite that. In elementary, I was good friends with nearly everyone in my grade. The older grades subject me to daily bullying, though which typically went unpunished no matter what I did. Despite all the bullying I kept pushing forward. I even tried to use it as constructive criticism so they would lose their reason to bully me, which is what eventually happened in high school.
One way my mother would push for me to grow was through Temple Grandin. “I am different, not less” was a favorite quote of hers to teach me about. She would also push other ideas from Grandin like “Sometimes you have to go outside your field of study to find the right people.”, “The world needs all types of minds.”, and “Social thinking skills must be directly taught to children and adults with ASD. Doing so opens doors of social understandings in all areas of life.”. I hated doing new things, but my mother was right to push these concepts into me. Learning social skills was something I did for most of my life (and still do). She knew early intervention would be best for me, and good thing she thought that.
From my official diagnosis, until halfway through 11th grade, I was in special education. It was slow, but eventual exponential growth. I’ve had many people, both friends and teachers alike, help me along my journey, and I wouldn’t be here without the combination of them and my will to persevere.
The willpower to keep growing was my key to overcoming the difficulties I had with Asperger’s. I would not have been nearly as successful with my growth and development if I didn’t have a growth mindset and the will to improve. A huge issue with a lot of people is the fact that they’ll experience a couple of setbacks, and just give up. To quote Winston Churchill, “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that count”. He is saying that success does not mean you will never fail again, and failing is not forever, but rather what matters is the will to keep going. Being born with a disability can be regarded as unfair, or a blessing depending on your perspective. Yes, every day will throw challenges at you, but that just means you get to grow quicker as a result. If I focused on the fact that I have a disability called Asperger’s Syndrome that disrupts my social and behavioral skills and didn’t try to improve them, I would never grow, and my issues would probably only get worse. “It’s not about the cards you’re dealt, but how you play the hand” (Randy Pausch).
I have been regarded as a success story in my high school. I started off not being able to interact with others, speak properly or behave well, to being regarded as a “popular” kid having lots of friends. In 7th grade, I was asked to do a little “Ted Talk” on Asperger’s Syndrome to my school district’s special education department and was asked multiple times to come back after that. Years later as a Senior, I was contacted to have an interview with the local paper, dubbed “Struggles won’t weigh Leigh down”. That moment really set in stone for both my family and me, how far I have come. If you set your heart to it, it’s possible. Look at Elon Musk, he has Asperger’s Syndrome!
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My name is Kerry Magro, a professional speaker and best-selling author who is also on the autism spectrum that started the nonprofit KFM Making a Difference in 2011 to help students with autism receive scholarship aid to pursue post-secondary education. Help support me so I can continue to help students with autism go to college by making a tax-deductible donation to our nonprofit here.
Autistics on Autism: Stories You Need to Hear About What Helped Them While Growing Up and Pursuing Their Dreams, was released on March 29, 2022 on Amazon here for our community to enjoy featuring the stories of 100 autistic adults. 100% of the proceeds from this book will go back to our nonprofit to support initiatives like our autism scholarship program. In addition, this autistic adult’s essay you just read will be featured in a future volume of this book as we plan on making this into a series of books on autistic adults.
