This guest essay is by Marlon Santos.
My family came to Los Angeles in 1982, fleeing the civil war in El Salvador. My mother is a nanny, and my father works on car upholstery. I am a first-generation college student at UC Riverside pursuing a degree in Music. Growing up, my family never made me feel different for who I was. I think my family story connects to who I am now as a music student because my family has always encouraged me to follow my dreams, even if I faced barriers to achieving these goals. My parents have always worked hard for me, but they could not model how to navigate those institutions because they never had those experiences themselves. I am a first-generation college student, and feel honored that my parents sacrificed so much for me to pursue my education.
I am also on the Autism spectrum. My diagnosis does not define me, but it is a part of who I am. When I found out I had Autism Spectrum Disorder, it actually helped me understand myself better. Growing up, my family never discussed what I had until I asked my mom about it. Autism has shaped my educational journey in both challenging and positive ways. As someone living with Autism, I have had to focus extra hard on my assignments to be successful in my classes. Background noise would throw me off completely. It took me longer to process things than I wanted. I have had to work twice as hard just to keep up.
I recognize I have unique strengths in the area of intensely focusing. When I have a quiz coming up and need to study all the details, I get into a state where nothing can distract me. Autism is a blessing for my passion, music. I think I hear music differently than most people. Music has been my safe space for as long as I can remember. Music helps me process my feelings, whether it's sadness, loneliness, or joy and excitement. I first started becoming a huge fan of rock music between the ages of 10 and 12 when I began exploring on YouTube.
When I was younger, I was receiving 3:1 services through my program, and I felt like I was not getting enough support with that ratio. One specific memory I have of speaking up for myself is when I was getting 3:1 services with my program. What I started doing was speaking up. For me, it was the beginning of understanding that my voice mattered and that I could take an active role in shaping my own future. That experience showed me that growth is not just about working hard. It is also about understanding what helps you learn, being honest about your needs, and speaking up even when it feels uncomfortable. When I advocate for myself, I am not only able to make a better future for myself and my family, but prove to myself that I can believe in myself. My advice to someone facing the same circumstances is: do not wait for someone to fix it for you.
I also made the decision to switch from Environmental Science to Music when I realized music was the path that fit me better. Making that switch took honesty because I had to pay attention to what was actually helping me grow instead of staying on a path that was not right for me. I am now pursuing a degree in Music with an emphasis in Music Industry, and I want to keep growing in music production, audio engineering, and creative collaboration. Since switching to Music, I have earned A's in both my music coursework and my general education classes, and I have raised my GPA from 2.71 to 3.17 over the past two semesters. Since I'm the first person in my family to go to college, I feel honored because my parents sacrificed everything for me to be here at UCR and pursue my education.
I see that path as more than just a career choice. It is also a way for me to build community, represent where I come from, and create work that brings people together. I also was the guy who doesn't use AI for his music, because I'm not a big advocate for it. I want to produce music for other artists and keep organic, human-made music alive in the age of AI. I want to keep human connection alive in music — something I believe deeply in as AI continues to replace it. My goal is to start my own independent record label after graduation, helping upcoming artists in rock and metal find their voice and share it with the world. And I want to give back to young people from backgrounds like mine who deserve a mentor but don't always find one. I want to use music as a vehicle to bring people together. I hope my success can show people that Autism is not an illness, a burden, or a disorder. It's not even a disadvantage to me. I just see it as another way to see the world and understand people.
This essay was submitted to the KFM Making a Difference scholarship program, founded by Dr. Kerry Magro to support autistic students pursuing postsecondary education.
